Doors, Faucets, Toilets & Electronic Books

I was watching Moms read a paperback & occasionally she would tap on the page she was reading. After my inquire she said she was “highlighting a word.” My thoughts were…” What? She got magic in those fingers?” Moms went on to explain that she forgets she is reading a paper book & not an electronic one. And that Its nothing for me to be concerned about if she taps the book sometimes.

Then ‘Moms goes on to tell me her door story. She is talking on her phone as she is trying to enter a store. She is at the store entrance door & just stands there waiting for it to open. After a bit, she is still standing there, in front of the door, waiting for it to open, while she is talking on the phone. A bit later she is still standing in front of the door. Now she starts to wonder why the door won’t open while she continues to converse on her phone. Eurika finally sees the door has a handle. Now feeling embarrassed she manually opens the door & enters the store while continuing to jabber on the phone.

The story of the facets is one of frustration for My Mama. Mom’s hands need washing. She is standing at the sink all soaped waiting for the water to start. She waves her hands under the facet this way & that way. Nothing happens. Then she brings her hands forward & back, still no water. She then repeats the process & sometimes water will actually start to come out. The times’ water still doesn’t come out is because there is a handle or button that has to be pushed. If My Mama is having a particularly difficult day she is surlily temped to just by-pass all that sink frustration & walkout unwashed. Yikes, I hope she doesn’t touch me when she gets back into the car!

The toilet story goes something like this… Mom is in a public pee room. Excuse me for a minute but in my mind wouldn’t a person “rest’ in a restroom & “bathe” in a bathroom? Are the 2-leggeds sleeping on the toilets or bathing in them? It is quite confusing to me. All I know for sure is that Mom pees in this room so I call it the pee room. Anyway, after Mom has done her peeing the open-mouthed toilet water monster makes a big nosey gulp & sucks everything down into its cavernous gut. Seems the tricky part is knowing how to kick off the action. I guess there used to be a handle to push. Now it seems there are hidden sensors that activate when Moms stands up. Some of the tricky ones have a tiny button a person is supposed to find & self-activate. Good thing Moms is not a drinker. I do not think she would find success in some of those places.

I know most of you 2-leggeds do not struggle with these basics as My Mama does. I hope the rest of you who do struggle realize that you are in amazing company, cuz My Mama is pretty special.

Maybe next time you find yourself in a pee room & the person next to you looks perplexed, maybe you could do a “nice” & turn their water on for them.

Every day I wake up happy I’m simply a dog. Peeing is just lifting a leg or doing a squat with a half-hearted kick of dirt behind me.

The picture is of Moms & me not in any of those frustrating places. I’m trying to play lap dog. Either I need a bigger Mom or a much smaller body, cuz I can only fit one hip in her lap.

Luv, Otis

(photo by Jon Ostendorf)

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